Warning, this will be lengthy.
It’s been a while. Which is an understatement. So much has happened.
1) I was majorly unhappy and it boiled down to my job.
I was so unhappy, I can’t even begin to explain. I had to tell my bosses so many times that I had too much work to do without anyone trying to help lessen my workload. Eventually, it led to my departure, leaving a type of law I really enjoyed, but I did not enjoy my workplace and job itself. I’m a month in at a new firm, in a new area of law, and learning quite a ton. I feel more valued, I will, and can, speak up. I am supported. If I feel like something is too much, I feel like I can turn to someone and tell them. Such a dramatic change that has me trying to find my ground in it.
2) I have been working on my anxiety.
I don’t really have an answer as to when it started. Possibly with my diagnosis with colitis since it probably kick-started that embarrassment of not knowing what was going on with my body and not having any control over it. It’s taken a lot out of me and it will be something I will always have to work on. I’m in therapy, doing meditation, and constantly are trying to do things that help relax and make me feel better. It’s been really difficult and I feel sometimes that I’ve lost who I am a bit which has been really difficult to grasp and get a hold of.
3) I went on vacation to Vancouver and came back engaged!
We went away to Vancouver to visit some friends, and let me tell you, we both still wish we were there. We had crappy weather but still had an amazing time. Not enough down time, but still an amazing trip. Now, the wedding planning commences! I’ve been on the ball a little bit, but I’ve been getting some stressors from some family members that have been difficult to manage, but I’ll get there!
4) I’m in a course that was for my old job.. that I am now trying to complete.
I enrolled myself in a course right when I went on vacation in September, and due to me leaving my job, I only get some of it funded (which is my fault anyway). The exam is over a week away and I was somewhat behind in the whole course due to a lot of factors, a major one being working 12 hour days at my old job, juggling two jobs, and trying to just not combust with stress.
5) We’re moving… again.
Not until the summer, but still. We’re moving into my fiance’s parents house to help pay down student debt/save money for our own home. Can’t really do that and save for a wedding. I was extremely reluctant to do this, and still am, but I know it’ll be worth it in the long run. The kicker that made me finally do this? Ontario made, wonderful *read sarcastic* new mortgage rules that make first time home buyers have an extremely difficult time in buying their first home. Hence the moving back in with my fiance’s parents house.
6) Sweating for the wedding.
I’m doing it. 100%. I’ve made small progress, and I’m allowing myself a few week “lax” period due to study mode that is in full effect, and so is the procrastination with this post, but I am going to make sure that I feel better overall and that includes my health.
I’ve really missed being active on here and reading for enjoyment but also to give feedback on the books I’ve read. I’ve made a goal this year to stop buying books (new releases that I’ve been dying for or using gift cards/points are excluded) so that leaves me with a huge pile of books I have to read this year. I’ve also re-read quite a few as well! I’m hoping I can try and give some more insight to books, life, health, and just whatever I like in general!